By Susan Coryell

What do you do with clients who won’t, or can’t, stay accountable to the action steps they set?

Every life coach has encountered this challenge. A client arrives at a session enthusiastic about change, commits to action, and yet, when the next meeting arrives, nothing has been done. One part of them is eager to pursue their goals, yet another part repeatedly allows distraction and sabotages their progress. Excuses emerge, avoidance sets in, accountability slips away and they receive the label of “Un-coachable Client”.

These clients often face common barriers that prevent follow-through, including:

• Lack of clarity on goals—They can’t define what they want. 
• Resistance to change—Fear and discomfort make clients hesitant to embrace new habits.
• Limited self-awareness—Some clients don’t fully grasp the underlying reasons for their struggles.
• Emotional and psychological barriers—Low self-esteem, anxiety, or past trauma may prevent clients from making meaningful progress. 
• Lack of accountability—Clients often lose momentum between sessions.

For many clients, this struggle isn’t just a matter of discipline; there is actually a much deeper conflict happening within their minds.  When this internal tug-of-war is a persistent pattern, it may be an indication of deep conflicting beliefs, values, desires and emotional trauma.  When they fail to gain understanding about the true obstacles within their subconscious, their failure to follow through reinforces negative beliefs and a further loss of trust in their own efficacy.  As they wander in circles, what opportunities are slipping away? What dreams are quietly being lost?

The Power of the Mind

The brain is an astonishingly complex system.  It processes over 10 million bits of information per second while managing thousands of functions simultaneously. But within its intricate workings, contradictions arise. Conflicting belief systems and competing goals can leave clients feeling overwhelmed, pulled in different directions, and unable to take action.

When a client’s conscious intentions conflict with their subconscious motivations, progress halts. The first step toward helping clients overcome this disconnect is guiding them to recognize that uncomfortable feelings represent very quiet internal programs (pre-language voices) that have been installed by others since childhood;  AND that not everything they have been taught to believe is true.

The Unreliability of the Voices

We all absorb countless perspectives throughout our lives, especially during formative years. The beliefs we inherit from parents, teachers, peers, and authority figures shape our internal narratives.  Much of what clients believe to be "truth" is no more than someone else’s subjective reality that has been passed down.  Most of these beliefs and thoughts do not present themselves in internal verbiage.  They are running in the background as abstract pictures and fragmented perceptions of memories.  The disempowering emotional states created by these thoughts hold clients back from achieving their full potential. Helping them identify and examine these beliefs can be a key to unlocking progress.

Strategies for Breakthrough – Taking the Deep-Dive

If a client continually sets a goal and then immediately shifts their focus elsewhere, consider guiding them through the following reflective exercises:

1. Identify competing priorities
• Ask: What goal or value does this “competing” action serve?
• Help them discover what their subconscious might be prioritizing.
2. Explore emotional avoidance
• Ask: What is this resistance protecting you from?   What are the uncomfortable feelings?
• Help them confront any hidden fears or anxieties.
3. Investigate internalized voices
• Ask: What does the client hear themselves saying when they attempt to work on their goal?
• Encourage them to identify feelings and put them into words.  Explore where the thoughts originated and assess whether they are still useful or valid.
4. Reframe limiting beliefs
• Ask: What would you need to believe to take action? What proof would support this new belief?
• Help them shift their thinking toward a more empowering mindset.

The Alignment Assignment: Aligning Conscious Goals with the Subconscious Mind

The subconscious mind doesn’t respond to logic alone; it communicates through images and emotions. Affirmations can reinforce existing beliefs, but deeper change happens when new beliefs are paired with vivid imagery and strong emotions.

Encouraging clients to visualize their goals with clarity and emotional intensity can significantly enhance their ability to follow through. When their subconscious mind accepts this vision as truth, actions will start to align effortlessly, and transformation takes place in their lives.

Ultimately, the subconscious dictates reality.  It colors perceptions, directs actions, and determines success. When we help clients align their conscious intentions with their subconscious programming, we can empower them to move past doubt, embrace change, and achieve lasting results.